WARNING!!! DEFICIENCY IN YOUR ACADEMIC RECORD! EMERGENCY!!!
Dear Alum of the esteemed New Paltz Evolutionary Psychology Laboratory,
If you are in receipt of this message, then it has come to my attention that while you may have completed all the requirements of your master’s degree at New Paltz, and you may well already be onto some awesome job or PhD program, from the perspective of the NP EP lab, you are deficient!
The primary deficiency on your account, according to our records, is this: Your thesis work (or another research project from your wonderful New Paltz days) is not yet published! …. We can fix that! Please contact me at your earliest convenience so we can work to carve out a plan to rectify this situation!
And although this is obviously a form letter, know that I miss you! And I hope all is great in your world.
p.s. please join the NP EP LAB FB group if you have not already – https://www.facebook.com/groups/283458421668566/ … we like alumni there!
p.p.s. and please join the NP Psychology Community group page so we all can stay connected moving forward! – https://www.facebook.com/groups/nppsych/ (this site includes information on the Self Monitor, which is the departmental newsletter). We love to include alumni in this publication – so please keep an eye out. Just saying!
Remember, I am only as successful as my least successful student! (read as, please try to get around to your research if and when time allows – wouldn’t it be great if it led to some publications!). And don’t worry, that “least successful student” to whom I refer is DEFINITELY NOT YOU!!!
_______________________________________________ Glenn Geher, Ph.D. Director of Evolutionary Studies Chair and Professor of Psychology State University of New York at New Paltz 600 Hawk Dr JFT 314 New Paltz, NY 12561 Office: JFT 314a Phone: (845) 257-3091 Fax: (845) 257-3474 E-mail: email@example.com Homepage: http://www.glenngeher.com New Paltz’s Evolutionary Studies Webpage: http://www.newpaltz.edu/evos Website for the international Evolutionary Studies Consortium: http://www.evostudies.org For my office hours, please see: glenngeher.com ************************************************ "Some will remember, no doubt, not only did they attend college, but that they went to the mountain." H. D. Thoreau